i realize i won’t ever fall asleep until i get this off my chest.
I don’t know how the other girlfriends do it, but i don’t think i’m quite as strong as them yet. sometimes i find myself being ungrateful for what and who i have in my life. :( I’m constantly reminding others not to take things for granted, i guess i should try looking in the mirror and remind myself the same thing.
Fact of the matter is, it’s definitely a challenge having the person you love hundreds of miles away. My heart is constantly in a different state with only a phone line to connect us two, and even then he’s not always available. It’s his job to travel, perform, be social and personable, and it’s a damn good job and i’m very proud of him. yet there are moments when i feel very selfish and just wish he were here with me all the time, and honestly…i hate myself for feeling this way because i know how hard he tries to balance his job and me AND enjoying himself. I know he misses me just as much, but he is definitely better at dealing with it than i am.
A person can only do so much in one day and you are doing a fine job, babe. I know what i signed myself up for and i’m working on it. :) deryck, you are the most wonderful and caring person, and i know we argue about this, but i’m certainly the lucky one, sweetheart :P
nothing ever worth keeping comes easy, and i damn well would rather work for it.
